Sorry I’m late, miss, I put blue food dye on my waffle! Teachers reveal pupils’ most bizarre excuses for tardiness

The school classrooms of today may be unrecognisable to those from years gone by – as chalkboards make way for interactive smartboards and paper textbooks are replaced by computers and tablets.

And new research suggest pupils’ excuses for tardiness and sloppiness have evolved far beyond ‘the dog ate my homework’, too.

Blue food dye, anxious toys and the lure of a Greggs bakery were among the extraordinary reasons for lateness provided by imaginative youngsters across the country.

The results were compiled following a survey of 2,000 teachers carried out by research app, Teacher Tapp.

Among the most unbelievable was a claim that a girl had accidentally put blue food dye on their breakfast waffle instead of syrup, and that her mother wanted to wash it from her face and hands before attending class.

Another bizarre response was from a student claiming they couldn’t leave the house until all their toys had been hugged because the toys had anxiety. 

A foodie excuse used by two pupils was that the wait for Greggs sausage rolls made them late for school

Teachers in rural schools responded to the survey with excuses that are animal-related, with pupils having to deliver various baby animals and ‘putting chickens back’

‘The ceiling in the boys toilets collapsed due to the weight of the vapes hidden inside the ceiling tiles so they had to go to a different toilet,’ another teacher said

Others put the blame on family members, claiming their grandmother was meant to drop them off but went to the wrong school. 

Teachers in rural schools responded to the survey with a string of animal-related excuses, with pupils apparently having to deliver various baby animals, ‘catching guinea fowls in a net’ and ‘putting chickens back’. 

Oddly, seagulls were mentioned specifically 18 times across the survey. Other animal excuses included being distracted by squirrels, dead bats, cute cats and ‘looking at cows that weren’t there’.

Another pupil told the teacher his ‘hamster was stuck in the chimney…again’. 

Some said they were confused and had been sat in the wrong lesson for 40 minutes, and that was why they weren’t on time.

In a puzzling explanation, one student told their teacher they were late because they got locked in a cemetery.

And another pupil very concerned with appearances tried saying they couldn’t attend because: ‘My eyebrow colour wasn’t correct’.

One teacher responded to the survey: ‘Put blue food dye on a waffle instead of syrup and mum was trying to wash it off from her face and hands before bringing her in!’

Other animal excuses included being distracted by squirrels, dead bats, and cute cats

Oddly, seagulls were mentioned specifically 18 times in excuses for being late

One said that the student adorably explained they couldn’t leave the house until all their toys had been hugged because the toys had anxiety

Another foodie excuse used by two pupils was that the wait for Greggs sausage rolls made them late.

In a more sympathetic response, one said: ‘I was stuck on top of a wardrobe’. 

The survey noted that this was genuine – a drama student was preparing a prop and someone took the step ladder.

‘The ceiling in the boys toilets collapsed due to the weight of the vapes hidden inside the ceiling tiles so they had to go to a different toilet,’ another teacher said.

In March, it was revealed that the number of school pupils classed as ‘severely absent’ – defined as missing at least half of all school days – is at a record high of more than 150,000.

With the figure tripling in just six years, fears are growing that serial absenteeism is ‘becoming entrenched’.

During the most recent year there was a rise of almost 30,000 children ‘severely absent’.

Head teachers said the ‘social contract’ through which parents ensure attendance had ‘fractured’ since the pandemic and are concerned that families got out of the habit of the daily school routine during the 2020 lockdowns.

Paul Whiteman, of school heads’ union NAHT, said: ‘School leaders and teachers are doing all they can to reverse the increase in pupils who are persistently absent.

‘However, absence rates are still significantly higher than before Covid and much more needs to be done to bring them down. The causes can span everything from illness, including mental health issues, to poverty and other challenges at home.’

Government data shows 150,256 children – two per cent – were classified as severely absent in 2022-23, the latest year available.

This was up from 120,623 the previous year, which represented 1.7 per cent of all pupils. In 2016-17 it was just 48,460, or 0.7 per cent of the total.