Politics

The Receipts Book Is An Ode To All The Women Who Have Ever Loved Them

It was during my third year of university that I first started listening to The Receipts Podcast. Every week, hearing Tolani Shoneye (Tolly), Milena Sanchez and Audrey Indome through my Soundcloud account brought me joy while I struggled to finish my dissertation.

In the years since, The Receipts Podcast has become a safe space for women of colour. It’s the place we go to laugh, cry and hear general insights into the day to day lives of other women like us.

Though the podcast mainly focuses on sex and relationships, the trio of hosts also touch on issues like race, religion and mental health. So when the news dropped that they’d be releasing a book, myself and thousands of others were thrilled.

Keep The Receipts – which came out last year and is now available in paperback – spans many of the topics the team are now famous for. But it also has a whole chapter dedicated to female friendship.

HuffPost UK sat down with two-thirds of gang, Tolly and Audrey, to find out what they really want us to take away about love, sisterhood and the bonds with women we make along the way.

You can never have too many friends

“I think the book is a love letter to all the Black women that have loved me, because those are the people who have made me exactly who I am today,” says Tolly.

“They’ve made such a huge difference in who I am. Being African, there’s not many conversations that I was privileged to have with my parents or even my older siblings. So I message my girlfriends because they’ve carved a space for me that’s just mine and I appreciate that so much.”

Audrey echos this and says “my friends are so important to me and I remember people would try and shame me about having so many friends. I’ve spun that on it’s head and I think it’s a positive thing.

“The book was really an ode to my friends, for being able to give them something in print to say: ‘This is how you’ve helped shape my life’. During the friendship chapter, I named all my friends individually and said what it is that they mean to me.”

Friendship break-ups cut deep

Even though female friendships can be a source of joy, we all know the feeling of going through a tough friendship break-up. Tolly speaks about one of her experiences in the book. “We stopped speaking because of a boy and it was just silly. I’d been friends with her since I was like 10 years old,” she says. “I’m really sad that we both don’t get to be in each other’s biggest celebratory moments.”

Audrey emphasises how she prides herself on maintaining friendships, so when one ends, she struggles not to see it as a personal failure.

“Friendship break-ups can be really painful and I’ve had a few friendship break-ups where I had to look at myself and ask myself if I was the problem,” she says. “No one’s perfect and sometimes these things just happen, but it’s sad.”




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