A personal trainer who was already happily married to a man has just got engaged to another woman after falling in love at a CrossFit class – and her husband doesn’t mind as long as she is happy.
Saskia Michalski, 27, from Hamburg, Germany, married her husband Marcin, 31, in 2017 after having been together for two years.
The couple had not even considered a polyamorous relationship until November 2019 when Saskia met marketing professional Lui Michalski, 27, and the two realised they were attracted to one another.
Saskia said: ‘Marcin has always been my perfect match.
Saskia Michalski, 27, (middle) from Hamburg, Germany, got engaged to Lui (right) this year despite having been married to Marcin (left) since 2017
Personal trainer Saskia first met marketing professional Lui at one of her classes and the pair quickly realised they were attracted to each other
Saskia said she had been nervous to admit her feelings for Lui to Marcin, but wanted to be honest with him and was surprised with how relaxed about it he was
‘Our love was crazy big in the beginning and has just got deeper and deeper each day since then.
‘We were both completely monogamous and never even imagined or discussed the possibility of an polyamorous relationship.
‘We were so in love and it was always us two against the world.
‘Lui and I met in one of my crossfit classes. We were both very attracted to each other, but didn’t make any steps as we were both in monogamous relationships.
‘It took a few months until we started talking outside of training, but then things happened fast.’
Saskia, Marcin and Lui formed a ‘V’ throuple, meaning both Marcin and Lui were sexually involved with with Saskia but not with each other
Marcin and Saskia married each other in 2017 after having first met two years previously in 2015
The trio believe that love is not a finite resource, which allows their relationship to work naturally without any jealousy
Wanting to be honest with her husband, Saskia admitted her feelings for Lui to her husband who was supportive of her and said he wanted her to be happy.
At the beginning of 2020, the trio formed a ‘V’ throuple whereby both Marcin and Lui formed romantic relationships with Saskia but not each other.
Due to the trio’s belief that love is not a limited resource, they claim they have managed to avoid any jealousy and promised to each other they would discuss any negative feelings they had immediately.
Saskia said: ‘I was super nervous and scared about telling Marcin.
‘I knew he would be understanding, but I didn’t know he would be as cool as he was about it.
Marcin and Saskia had not even considered a polyamorous relationship until Saskia met Lui at one of her classes
Saskia said that Marcin never saw Lui as a threat and instead welcomed her into their family with open arms
Saskia said that although Marcin and Lui are not romantically involved with each other, they still care for one another and want to spend the rest of their lives alongside each other
‘All he said when I told him I was in love was, “You think I didn’t know that already?”.
‘He welcomed Lui into our life as if she was his new family member.
‘He never saw Lui as a threat. Rather, he saw how happy she made me and that made him happy.
‘Marcin and Lui have a very loving but not romantic or sexual relationship.
‘They care for each other and want to spend the rest of their lives with each other but not in an intimate way.’
The majority of comments that the throuple have received about their relationship have been positive from other people
After five months of seeing each other, Lui (left) proposed to Saskia earlier this year and although they cannot legally marry, they hope to tie the knot in 2021
Occasionally the trio will receive a harsh comment and have been told in the past that their relationship will end in disaster
After five months of dating, Saskia and Lui got engaged and while they can’t legally be married or share a surname, they hope they will be able to tie the knot in 2021.
Despite the majority of comments the throuple have received being positive, a few strangers have said that they are ‘going to hell’ and that their relationship will end in disaster.
Saskia said: ‘Since we outed ourselves publicly, we have received a huge wave of love. People thank us for giving them strength and inspiring them.
‘Some people even say that they were judgemental at first but changed their mind once they got to know us online.
‘Of course, we get trashy and hateful comments too with people saying, ‘It can’t be real love,’ and that we’re ‘going to hell.’
On a practical level, the trio are able to afford a comfortable lifestyle – thanks to three incomes – and they believe the extra love and emotional support is what makes their relationship so special
‘However, we truly think these people are just still on their journey to finding love and acceptance and we wish them the best.’
For Saskia, Lui, and Marcin, the benefits of being in a triad relationship are bountiful.
On a practical level, with three incomes they are able to afford a large apartment and have money to spare.
However, they believe the additional love and emotional support makes their relationship special.
‘We all now have two life partners that are looking out for us and taking care of us,’ said Saskia.
‘Love is not a limited resource and you can’t put rules onto love.
‘We need to stop thinking we can decide what love is supposed to look like for others.
‘It’s ok to be gay; it’s ok to be heterosexual; it’s okay to live a monogamous lifestyle and it’s okay to live polyamorously.
‘However, it is not okay to judge.’